Beards, baldness and brass

Hello lovely people!
WOW, WOW, WOW! What a wonderful week, oh yessssss! As many of you know I started a fundraiser for the Multiple Sclerosis Trust a little while ago pledging not to shave or have my hair cut until either a brexit deal is accepted by the UK’s Parliament and the EU or that article 50 is rescinded.
Of course, I didn’t ask anybody about the disadvantages or advantages of growing a beard. The no haircut bit was easy as 44 years ago my hair length was over my shoulders, AND I HAD A MOUSTACHE. The hair was an obvious statement of rebellion against everything non-teenage. The moustache was a different matter because it consisted of 6 rather transparent and microscopically thin hairs. This rebellion was by my prospective moustache against me for trying to do something that was impossible for another couple of years. I knew it was there though and was proud of the sextuplet of widely spaced microfilaments.
Things change with age though as my moustache and beard are obviously growing and although my cranial hair is also growing, an increasing number of hair follicles on my head are giving up the ghost and refusing to produce even bum fluff (as we called teen-moustaches). Still, Francis Rossi did it and he did OK for himself. Ponytail and shiny head here we come!
Back to the advantages and disadvantages of not shaving. One advantage is that whilst it is in the ‘normal’ length range I have got somewhere to store bits of food from breakfast or dinner for a mid-meal snack. Health and safety says I have to store meat and vegetables separately which can cause a problem so I now put meat into the left side of my mouth and veggies in the right side of my mouth. People don’t notice me doing this because of my lack of coordination with MS, so it just looks like me throwing food around as normal. Also, I can use my beard to clean oven pans and dishes with food stuck on them because at the moment my beard has the texture of a brillo pad. Having this facial growth is also useful for scratching itches in areas of my body that my chin can reach. It’s a shame I can’t reach my back but hey, I do what I can.
The disadvantages are that it itches like having hyperctive ants running around in it looking for the morsels of food that I have stored there for later. I also spend lots of time explaining why I look more and more like Worzel Gummage, so I’ve put a sign on the back of my wheelchair explaining it. The biggest disadvantage is that if I stop in town for a quick wheelchair arm rest, people want to give me money – not for the fundraiser but through pity. All I need is a scrawny dog sitting next to me to complete the look.
All that said, my friends, blog readers and people who feel sorry for me have raised ₤558 (at the time of writing this). This is an amazing amount which shows me that people really do care about the problems of MS and value the work the MS Trust does. We have a generous selfless community helping me to make this fundraiser successful. If it reached the ₤1000 I will start dying my beard different colours like Roy Wood in Wizard, which will make a difference as at the moment it is a boring grey/brown colour.

This is not a short but a looooong fundraising campaign. How long we don’t know, but because of the fantastic response from all of you, I am sticking with it until the end. Even my boss (Victoria) now sees that it is a worthwhile endeavour.
At the beginning of this phase of my weird and strange endeavour , she foresaw me ending up looking like a ZZ Top reject who raised ₤20. Well that was busted very early on and so she really has got behind it (me) for the loang run. Ah, another disadvantage of a hairy face is that she doesn’t like being kissed by someone with a hairy face!!!!!!!!!!!
My fundraiser is on my personal Facebook page www.facebook.com/daveharper1958
I’m off now to concentrate on sprouting as much fuzz as possible.
TTFN           38


To donate to this worthy cause please click the facebook icon and find the donate entry on the page